castironnerves
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Wednesday Oct 12, 2011
Wednesday Oct 12, 2011
October 12, 2011
I am again hindered by the fact that this computer doesn’t have earphones on which I can listen to the recording that goes with this post. I think I got the right one, though.
This recording, from October 8, 2011 gives another example of me responding to someone who has just been completely violating to me by using the same kind of language that she used. She wasn’t around by the time I said what I said about her into the recorder; she had committed walk-by harassment and she and her friend were several yards away from me almost as soon as she’d said what she said. I really think that she and her friend stalked me to the corner so that she could say what you hear on the recording.
I try not to respond to the kind of statement that she made with the same kind of statement, and, most of the time, I think I manage not to. I don’t always manage not to get angry; lately, “You’re a dumb b----!” has been replacing my “Bless you!” response to women who cough when they pass by me, for example. I’ve been giving those kinds of profanity-laden responses to men, too, more often. However, from my perspective, the kind of statement that the woman who walked within a few inches of me made in this recording is more harassing and more violating than something like “You dumb b----!” or “You f---ing a---hole, stay the f--- away from me” is when someone has already gone out of his or her way to be violating to you. I’ve always felt that way, since the beginning of this situation; there’s getting angry at someone, losing your temper and saying something less than polite, and then there’s what that woman did, which was premeditated, conscious, completely gratuitous, vicious sexual harassment of me, a total stranger to her.
I don’t think that there’s another, unpublished recording of me, so far, that shows me responding in kind to people who harass me or to other kinds of harassment.
Overall, I thought this recording was funny, despite its terrible subject matter, so I wanted to publish it. I also wanted to give an explanation for why I made one statement that was like the woman’s unprovoked, repeated statement.
I’m at the Boston Public Library, where the coughing started the second I got here.
Unprovoked; these people are completely unprovoked by me.
Copyright L. Kochman, October 12, 2011 @ 5:05 p.m.
Wednesday Oct 12, 2011
Wednesday Oct 12, 2011
October 12, 2011
I don't have sound on this computer; I made this recording before 7:00 a.m. this morning.
They had flooded at least half of one side of a block of Newbury Street. There was water coming out of the street, around the corners of a square, metal flat thing that I guess is above pipes that are underground.
The water was running down that side of the street, in both directions. Even though it was draining around the corner in a street drain, it was a steady swath of water several feet wide and inches tall that was coming from underground. Parking wasn't even a question; nobody could park there, or step off into the street without getting at least ankle-deep in water
At first, when I saw that the pipe was connected to a fire hydrant, and then saw the water coming out from under the street, I thought that maybe they were flooding under the street from the fire hydrant. It's the same idea; it seems as if they broke the valve on the pipe and have been letting the fire hydrant supply water to every building in the street that was affected by that valve being broken.
How much money is that? How much water is it? How much extra labor? How much has all of the corruption COST, since it began in regard to me and to all women?
I realized today that it looks as if my podcasts show up in opposite numbers to how I numbered them when I made them. I numbered them the way that they show up in the dashboard, for me, and didn't think about looking at the listings in the podcast as it appears in public in its entirety.
I'm not sure if I can fix that or not; not today.
Copyright L. Kochman, October 12, 2011 @ 1:18 p.m./addition @ 1:23 p.m./I don't want to say "No Code" again; I really don't. I try to stay consistent. @ 1:24 p.m.
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
October 11, 2011
Here’s a recording that I made when I left CVS on the same day as the previous recording. I had two large bags at that time, which were difficult to carry with me. I had to carry them with me for a couple of weeks, until I had been at the Boston Public Health Commission shelter in Quincy long enough to get a locker.
Then, as I’ve already mentioned online, I was at a shelter in Boston that lets you stay for 6 nights in a row, without a lottery, as long as you stay for those consecutive nights. It was near the end of September, and I thought I would probably have to pay my locker rent for the month of October, but it was the middle of my 6 days at the shelter in Boston. I called the shelter in Quincy and was told not to worry about it, to complete my 6 days in Boston and then go out to Quincy to deal with my locker.
When I got out to Quincy, as planned, my locker was empty. Although I hadn’t enjoyed carrying two heavy bags with me all the time, I’d rather be doing that now than for all of my clothes besides what I’m wearing, one shirt, one thin, ripped, stained sweatshirt that I got after my other things got taken, one other pair of socks, and a couple of pair of underwear to be removed from my life. Things don’t get donated in my size very often, and, when they do, they’re often not in good condition.
The beginning of the recording shows me trying to balance the bags as I’m walking and talking.
I’ve continued to see the Stowe, Vermont ad that shows a hot air balloon on some of the Boston public busses here. If I’m recalling correctly, it also has a picture of someone in a red shirt. I repeat my protest from the recording, Stop Screwing Up My State!
Copyright L. Kochman, October 11, 2011 @ 12:21 p.m.
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
October 11, 2011
Here’s a tape recording that I made at CVS on Harrison Avenue in Boston, a few weeks ago. That CVS is around the corner from Boston Medical Center. I probably made the recordings at CVS and at Boston Medical Center on the same day.
Obviously, my use of the word “exciting” in the recording is meant to be sarcastic, to indicate that it’s a bad situation that is only ceasing to be as scary as it used to be because I’m getting used to dealing with these bad situations and not because I no longer think that they are bad situations.
I didn’t put any code anywhere in it. As I’ve said many times, and very consistently by now, there’s no code in anything that I do unless I say that there is.
Copyright L. Kochman, October 11, 2011 @ 12:09 p.m.
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
October 11, 2011
This is another recording that I made at Boston Medical Center. I said at the end that I recorded it on September 14, 2011.
I didn’t consciously get a Boston accent. When I got to Boston, I thought, “It might be fun to have a Boston accent for a while, so I won’t try not to get one.”
It’s not that pronounced in this recording; in some later recordings, it is.
I have found that most people don’t want to answer the question “Why are you doing this?” or “Can you explain the reasoning for your behavior?” about harassing behavior. Especially when shown a tape recorder, most of them are reluctant to say anything at all; without the tape recorder, they might laugh and/or confidently tell lies that deny that anything’s going on.
Even though the guy started rubbing his nose when he saw the tape recorder, he backed up a few feet, too; he seemed to think that rubbing his nose was a gesture that would work to intimidate me, and it didn’t, just as the Wet Floor sign didn’t keep me out of the gift shop to ask what it was doing there, on completely dry floor.
Copyright L. Kochman, October 11, 2011 @ 2:34 p.m.
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
Tuesday Oct 11, 2011
October 11, 2011
I thought that I might publish some of the first recordings that I made with the recorder that I got a few weeks ago.
I made this recording at Boston Medical Center, probably on September 14, 2011.
Near the beginning of the recording, I mention that I’m going into Boston Medical through an entrance that is near the emergency room, in the Menino Pavilion.
Near the end of the recording, a woman sneezed at me as I passed her in the hall; I wasn’t sure when I made the recording if she got on the tape, but she did.
A few days ago I heard an ad on the radio that was advertising for people to try “clinical trials for Crohn’s disease at Boston Medical Center!”
It seems to me that clinical trials shouldn't be advertised to people as if it were better to participate in a clinical trial than to get treatments that have already been through all of their testing phases and have already been approved and in use for at least a few years.
Copyright, with noted exceptions, L. Kochman, October 11, 2011
@ 11:20 a.m./edited @ 11:23 a.m.
Saturday Oct 08, 2011
Saturday Oct 08, 2011
Saturday Oct 08, 2011
October 8, 2011
It couldn't have been more obvious from the second I signed up for this blog that the service is servile to the conglomerate. However, as in other situations, I have to use what's available to me.
I suppose I could spend a lot of time looking for a more hospitable, free audio blog. However, time is something that I don't have a lot of on the Internet.
I have called this audio blog castironnerves because, despite both my occasional loss of them and my occasional failure to inspire others to possess them, I like the phrase.
As I was signing up for this blog, the first security word that the blog asked me to confirm was “fezzy,” written in green.
The final one was “chafewax,” in red.
That means that someone who works for podbean was sitting there sending me those security words, which I think is both invasive and abusive.
(I don't know why the print changed in the middle. I have that problem with this computer a lot.)
A few notes about my 10/07/11 voicemails to the New York Times reader comment line:
--I don’t agree with Taylor Swift’s politics
--I don’t agree with anyone calling Ms. Swift “trailer”
--I don’t agree with the ongoing cruelty of the conglomerate and its supporters to people whom the conglomerate has manipulated over the past year
--On the front page of the NYT today, there are these three, small captions for stories at the bottom of the page, with the first two in one section and the third one next to that section:
“NEW YORK A-14-15
Neighbors weary of protest
With the long lines for restrooms and barricades that block strollers, among other things, many have lost patience with Occupy Wall Street Page A 14
672 School Layoffs Take Effect
The loss of jobs represents the largest number of single-agency layoffs under Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg Page A 14”
“BUSINESS DAY
Endangered Mail Service
The United States Postal Service has warned 3, 700 communities, many of them in rural areas, that it is considering shuttering their local offices over the next few months. That is worrying towns like Neville, Ohio. Page B 1”
Here’s my analysis of the New York Times’ use of code with those three stories and the placement of those captions on the front page:
--The New York Times took what I said last night, 10/07/11, about the conglomerate’s abuse of people who live in and around Boston, with all of the fake and unnecessary construction in Boston and the possibly faked problems on roads, blocking traffic to and from Boston’s surrounding areas, and the NYT used that idea to attack Occupy Wall Street.
--The New York Times is continuing to tell the conglomerate’s lie that there is no government money to pay for public schools. That lie is a preliminary phase of the conglomerate's plan to sell public schools and the students in them to corporations.
--This is the first time that the New York Times has threatened to shut off the reader comment line, or to refuse to tell anyone what I say in my voicemails on that comment line. I’ve been leaving voicemails on that line since at least December of 2010; while I was in the hospital, I would sometimes leave long, rambling, raging messages several times a day, and the NYT never threatened before to shut the comment line off. In fact, I’ve left long, rambling, raging messages on that line for months, even since I’ve been in Boston, although my contact with the NYT has been diminishing more all the time. I’ll go weeks without calling them, and haven’t called them much at all recently.
My messages from last night aren’t particularly long, rambling or raging.
However, what I did say in the first message was that my tape-recording the message and then playing it into the phone for the reader comment line would mean that if any dispute occurred about what the message I had left said, I would have a record of exactly the message I had left. I said nothing at all into the phone last night to the reader comment line except for what was in the pre-recorded messages; all I did was call the number and then hold the tape recorder to the receiver.
My using that method for leaving messages for the New York Times means that the newspaper can’t abuse the messages I leave for it anymore, or twist around its interpretation of those messages; not without the newspaper being found out by everyone who follows what I write, and now say, online.
As for the newspaper’s use of the word “shuttered;” anyone who’s interested in finding out why the newspaper used that word should ask the newspaper, which will be incapable of producing any voicemail from yesterday, from me, except for what I put in those 2 messages. As anyone can hear, I made no mention at all of Leonardo DiCaprio in those messages, and I’m wondering what people who have accused me of being a liar, untrustworthy and a callous person think of the efforts of that newspaper and other media, businesses, organizations and individuals who continue to try to encourage Mr. DiCaprio’s interest in me.
I didn't say "worser" in the first message. It sounds that way, but I was saying "worse" and "or" or "worse" and "er." Either way, it's not fabulous public speaking, with all of my hemming and hawing, but hemming and hawing is still better than saying something such as "worser."
There's no code in any of it, or in any of this.
I think that there’s another note I should make about the first recording.
A “pressing issue” is the fact that I can’t do a Google search on anyone’s name without being accused of things that aren’t true. It is a really bad invasion of privacy, in addition to being harassment, in addition to being malicious, in addition to being deceitful, that that happens to me.
A settled issue is a settled issue; I hope I’m not too guilty of over-settling. I seem more often to be accused of being maliciously unsettling, which has never been true.
Copyright, with noted exceptions, L. Kochman, October 8, 2011 @ 12:47 p.m./addition @ 1:26 p.m.